Let’s Break Up With
Perfectionism, Shall We?
It can be challenging for others to fully grasp the extent of the self-imposed pressure you put on yourself and the constant feeling of treading water. Beneath the surface, you dedicate significant effort to stretching yourself (too) thin to care for those who hold importance in your life. While others may not see it, you often find yourself trapped in “analysis paralysis,” overthinking even the simplest decisions in your personal life. Whether it’s choosing what to eat for lunch or wording an email, you struggle to make the “right” decision, craving approval, seeking confirmation and desperately wanting to please as many people as possible with your actions. I can help you hit “pause” on the people pleasing playlist and tune into a *new and improved* playlist we will curate together that I will title “Exhale Doubt, You’ve Got This, Inside and Out!” P.S. If you aren’t vibing with that title, consider it a placeholder for now 😉
“Understanding the difference between healthy striving and perfectionism is critical to laying down the shield and picking up your life. Research shows that perfectionism hampers success. In fact, it’s often the path to depression, anxiety, addiction, and life paralysis.”
~ Brene Brown
Perfection is a Myth. Confidence is real.
Your Best is the NEW Perfect!
Wearing the mask of having it all together has become second nature to you, and you often receive comments from others like, “I don’t know how you manage everything.” On the surface, it appears that you effortlessly meet work deadlines, maintain some order in the house, and take care of the various responsibilities in your life, including loved ones, whether they are human, pets, or plants. However, what others may not realize is the immense amount of energy and effort you pour into wearing and maintaining the “I have my shit together mask,” while nurturing others. While you excel at putting others needs first, you have unintentionally neglected to recognize the importance of self-care.
While attending to everyone and everything else in your life, you frequently find yourself uttering the phrase, “I’m just so busy, I don’t have time for…” – whether it’s taking care of your own well-being, spending quality time with friends, prioritizing exercise, engaging in dating or relationships, or even simply dedicating time to meal preparation.
Therapy to Embrace the Messy Journey
of Overcoming Perfectionism with
Compassion
It is essential to remember that your worth is not determined by your level of productivity! The quantity of tasks accomplished does not define your value as a person! It’s important to acknowledge that self-care, balance, and nurturing your own needs are vital aspects of a fulfilling and vibrantly healthy life. You deserve to allocate time and attention to activities that bring you joy, nourish your body and soul, and foster meaningful connections. Prioritizing your own well-being is not selfish; it is an essential act of self-love and self-respect. Remember, you are worthy simply because you exist, and your worth extends beyond what you can accomplish in a given day.
“You are magnificent beyond measure, perfect in your imperfections, and wonderfully made.”
– Abiola Abrams
Therapy for Perfectionists in Texas, Florida and *most* of the United States
The tasks that consume your time often serve as a clever avoidance strategy, allowing you to avoid confronting deeper feelings or insecurities. You find a sense of pride in how much you can accomplish in a day, as if it makes you superhuman. However, even with your impressive productivity, there is an underlying feeling of not being good enough. This love/hate relationship with productivity leads you to overcommit yourself when you know good and damn well your plate is already full! Whether it is joining book clubs, attending social events, volunteering on committees, whatever it is, you often find yourself scrambling to meet deadlines, even when you genuinely don’t have the time available!
You go to great lengths to fulfill your commitments, meeting deadlines and attending functions, because the thoughts of “failing” is unbearable. However, this dedication comes at a steep cost. You find yourself running on empty with your relationships bearing the brunt of your exhaustion. There’s a part of you that believes if you could just take a few days off to recharge and recover, everything would be okay. But the idea of taking time off without a “legitimate” reason, such as being physically ill and contagious, or going on vacation, triggers intense feelings of guilt. You feel conflicted about prioritizing your own well-being and struggle with giving yourself permission to rest and rejuvenate.
Therapy can be a powerful tool in breaking free from a perfectionist mindset and learning to value yourself more. I provide a supportive and non-judgmental space where you can explore the root causes of perfectionism and gain insights into the underlying beliefs and patterns that are the driving force behind your perfectionistic tendencies. Together we will dive in and challenge that itty-bitty-shitty-committee living rent free in your brilliant brain, shift it towards focusing on self-acceptance and redefine what it means to appreciate your own achievements, and finally recognize the value you bring to the table and prioritize your own self- worth!
You courageous human, have come to the right place!
Overcome Perfectionism with Dr. Vincent:
Explore the roots of your perfectionism
Learn healthier perspective taking
Challenge black/white aka all-or-nothing thinking
Tackle the fear of failing
Become less critical of self and others
Identify flawed beliefs/biases
Helping you is what I do.
I often use a metaphor of describing therapy as driving a car. YOU are in the driver’s seat and you tell me what your final destination is. Want to learn how you can set more realistic goals for yourself that you CAN actually accomplish AND still feel like the productive, high achiever badass that you are? Or maybe you would like to learn how to feel GREAT about your work being GOOD ENOUGH? I am your professional GPS and know many different ways to get us to your respective destination(s). Some routes may be shorter, while others may be longer, less bumpy, more scenic, and require experimenting to find the ones that resonate with you and are the most efficient in reaching your desired destination. Similar to Waze and Google Maps, alerting you to upcoming obstacles or suggesting alternate detours, I will also help you navigate these obstacles and find better paths. Therapy is just a matter of making tweaks and trying new routes until we find the one(s) that are the most efficient for you! Unlike Waze and Google Maps, my professional GPS navigation system comes equipped with oodles of valuable support, encouragement, a consistent presence throughout the length of your therapy journey and expert tactics to help you create the life you crave. This all begins in therapy by: leaving your comfort zone, experiencing a relationship with appropriate boundaries, connecting with someone who can handle #allyourfeels, having someone show up for you consistently, and whom you genuinely trust to share your authentic self with.
Disclaimer
Online counseling is not appropriate for all kinds of problems.
If you are in crisis or having suicidal thoughts, it’s important that you seek help immediately.
24/7 Help is available at your fingertips: please call 1-800-273-8255 (National Suicide Prevention Lifeline) or visit them
at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ and ask for help.
You may also text ‘HOME’ to 741741 to connect with a Crisis Counselor.
If you are experiencing an emergency, please call 911 or go to your nearest emergency room.
Life In Progress Psychological Services, PLLC does not offer emergency services.
Therapy can change your life if you let it…
Life In Progress
Dr. Nichole Vincent, PsyD
“I’m always looking for ways to help you have the best life possible. No matter what you have been through, I believe you can still have a life worth living that is full of meaning.” ~David Kessler
SERVING ALL OF:
AL, AZ, AR, CO, CT, DC, DE, FL, GA, ID, IL, IN, KS, KY, ME, MD,
MI, MN, MO, MS, NC, ND, NE, NH, NJ, NV, OH, OK, PA, RI, SC,
SD, TN, TX, UT, VA, VT, WA, WI, WV and WY
THROUGH ONLINE COUNSELING
